Things I Wish I Never Said
by sktrgrl13
Summary: Scott and Virgil are as close as any set of brothers could possibly be, but harsh words and an accident threaten to tear them apart forever...
1. Chapter 1

**I DON'T OWN THE THUNDERBIRDS OR THE MAGNIFICENT CHARACTERS THAT GO WITH IT! … although, I wish I could have Virgil and Scott…**

Thirteen year old Virgil Tracy stormed away from his oldest brother, his cheeks flushed with intense heat. His heart was pounding in his chest angrily and tears threatened to roll down his cheeks. He stormed into the kitchen where his other older brother John and his two younger brothers Gordon and Alan were enjoying breakfast. He plopped down on the chair and buried his face in his arms. His body was trembling with so much anger he thought he was going to explode, or maybe even implode, Virgil didn't know which one was going to come first, he just knew one of them would happen if he saw Scott again. Virgil felt eyes on him and it made him uncomfortable, even if he wasn't looking them in the eye. He lifted his head and he found John's electric blue eyes examining him carefully,

"Virg, what happened?"

"Scott lied to me," He huffed, "That's what happened."

John raised his fine blonde brow quizzically and Virgil sighed in defeat. He could never keep anything from John almost as much as he couldn't keep anything from Scott. It must be a big brother thing; Virgil didn't like it.

"You know that concert I'm playing at this weekend?"

John nodded, a smile spreading across his lips,

"Yeah, I'm so excited for it. These little ones are too believe it or not; Gordy won't shut up about it."

The eleven year old red head's face turned a brilliant red that almost made his face blend in with his hair.

"Even if that's true Johnny, doesn't mean you have to go babble about it." Gordon muttered.

John laughed at his little brother's embarrassment and ruffled his hair affectionately. Gordon sighed impatiently and smoothed his hair back down while laughing himself.

"So what does Scott have to do with the concert?" John asked Virgil.

"Everything," He growled, "He told me he would go and now he says he can't because he's 'going out with the boys'."

John shook his head sadly. With Scott being sixteen and Virgil being thirteen, John knew there would eventually be problems between the two boys. Growing up Virgil and Scott were pretty much joined at the hip; wherever Scott went so did Virgil. Normally, older brothers would be mad, but they always had this special bond that no one could understand. Even with John in between them those two just stick. But now, Scott is starting to distance himself from Virgil more and more. Scott wouldn't even tell John why; Scott just claimed it was because Virgil was too young for him to hang out with, but it never stopped him before.

John put his arm around Virgil comfortingly,

"I'm sorry Ace…"

Virgil shrugged off his arm and stood up from the table abruptly,

"Don't call me that."

Virgil ran upstairs to his room and slammed his door shut. John winced at the sound and his two younger brothers looked at their musical brother's now vacant chair. Once in his room, Virgil started to collect his school supplies and shove them into his backpack. A silent knock came from outside his door and he knew who it was immediately; it didn't make his any happier.

"Go away Scott."

He heard his door open and he whipped around angrily. His oldest brother was watching him sadly, his cobalt eyes downcast. Virgil always looked up to his older brother, but all Virgil wanted to do right now was punch him in the face. Even if Virgil was the smallest in the family, he could pack a good wallop; all his brothers knew and experienced it; except for Alan of course, but he was six.

"Virg, let me talk to you."

"No Scott, I told you to go the hell away." Virgil growled.

"Don't talk to me like that." Scott said impatiently.

"Or what? You already ruined everything; you already hurt me enough by lying to me."

Scott sighed and ran his hand through his dark brown hair,

"I made those plans a while ago and I just forgot…"

The anger bubbled under Virgil's surface. He knew that was a blatant lie, hell Virgil knew very well why Scott was standing him up. After all these years of supporting his art and music, Scott had finally decided to turn into his father. Just like he feared in the kitchen, he exploded into pure rage.

"That's bullshit Scott and you know it."

"Excuse me?" Scott said darkly.

"The only reason why you're not coming to my concert is because I look like Mom isn't it? You can't bear to see me play the piano because it drudges up all the painful memories doesn't it? I thought you were different from him Scott, I thought you actually cared about me!" Virgil felt tears prickling at the corner of his eyes and he pushed them back.

"Goddammit Virgil!" Scott yelled, "It's only one stupid concert and you're acting like it's the end of the world!"

"It's because it's on the anniversary isn't it? If it was any other day you would go wouldn't you?" Virgil whispered spitefully.

Scott's face lost all colour and Virgil smiled sadly,

"I thought so; you still blame me don't you."

"Virgil…"

"It's true isn't it!" Virgil screamed, "Just say it Scott! You blame me for Mom's death! It's my fault her and Gordon were on that hill, and it's my fault that I wasn't fast enough! It's my fault that both yours and John's childhood were taken away from you! So stop hiding it Scott, I know that it's painful for you to look at me!"

At first he didn't even know what happened; it was a delayed reaction. It took Virgil a moment to realize that Scott had actually slapped him across the face. Virgil lifted his hand and pressed it against his stinging cheek.

"You want me to say it Virgil Grissom Tracy then I'll say it," Scott growled as he looked down at his younger brother venomously, "IT'S YOUR FAULT THAT MOM ISN'T HERE RIGHT NOW! IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU, WE WOULD HAVE A MOM RIGHT NOW!"

Virgil knew that was what plagued his brother's mind and he had goaded him into saying it, but now Virgil wished he hadn't. He never wanted to believe that his oldest brother thought of him that way. He could no longer stop the tears from falling down his cheeks; he wiped his eyes furiously as he moved around Scott and ran out of his room. He could hear his brother's running footsteps behind him, but Virgil just ran outside the cold air suffocating him on the way out. His mind briefly screamed at him for not bringing his inhaler, but his mind was also too muddled for him to actually process it. The snow pressed against his skin and froze his tears on his face. He started for the bus stop across the street when he heard Scott's agonized shout,

"VIRGIL MOVE!"

Before Virgil could even process what was happening, something struck him throwing up into the air and onto what he realized was the windshield of a car. He felt the windshield shatter under his weight. When the car stopped Virgil rolled off the hood and onto the snow white ground. He vaguely heard the car speed off and he heard Scott yelling his name off in the distance. He willed himself to sit up and tell his brother that he was okay, but he realized his couldn't. The last thing he saw was Scott falling to his knees by his side, with tears in his eyes.

_That's weird,_ He found himself thinking, _Scotty never cries…_

That's when he welcomed the arms of Darkness' embrace.

TBTBTBTBTB

Scott regretted it as soon as he said it. Truthfully, he never ever blamed Virgil for what had happened, but there he was blaming him for no reason. His heart broke when he saw the tears welling up in Virgil's almond shaped honey-brown eyes. He was about to say something, anything, to make it up to his younger brother, but Virgil practically flew out of the room. Scott chased after him, hoping to catch him before he made it to the bus stop. He slipped on his shoes at the door and ran outside. He saw his brother walking across the street and Scott ran towards the front gate to go after him. Suddenly, the sound of screeching tires met his ears. Scott looked down the road and saw a large, black truck heading straight for his brother, who wasn't paying attention.

"VIRGIL MOVE!"

His little brother looked up, but it was too late. Scott's heart shattered when he saw his smallest brother got thrown into the air and into the windshield with a deafening crack. The truck lurched and Virgil rolled off as fast as he was thrown on. The sped off down the road, but at this point, Scott wasn't thinking about that. He couldn't take his eyes off his brother's mangled form on the cold ground. Scott ran straight to his brother and fell to his knees right beside him; his sobs choked him. The once pure white snow was drenched in the crimson flow of Virgil's life.

"Virgil," He choked, "Ace, open your eyes, for me please."

Virgil stayed lifeless on the ground. Scott wanted to pick him up and hold him close, but he didn't want to risk hurting him any more than he already had. Scott gently lifted Virgil's head onto his lap in order to keep his brother's neck straight and supported. He ran his hand through Virgil's chestnut brown hair and glanced back towards the house,

"JOHN!" He screamed desperately, "JOHN, GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE NOW!"

He turned back to Virgil and watched his tears fall onto Virgil's pale, bloody face. He continued to run his hand through Virgil's hair rhythmically, waiting for John to make his appearance. He knew John had arrived when he heard a scream of terror coming from behind him. In a matter of moments John was beside his two brothers, tears falling down his face immediately. He reached his hand out to touch his younger brother, but he hesitated,

"Scotty, what happened?"

"Johnny, go inside and call an ambulance," He ignored the question, "Keep the younger ones inside at all cost, they don't need to see this. After you're done on the phone, come back outside with some blankets, we have to keep him warm."

John didn't move, he had his eyes locked on his younger brother.

"JOHNNY GO NOW!"

As if on automatic, John pushed himself onto his feet and ran into the house. Scott stayed where he was and cradled his baby brother, tears still cascading down his cheeks.

"I'm so sorry Virgil," He sobbed, "I'm so sorry."

The only sound on the quiet street was the sound of a tortured older brother's anguished cries.

TBTBTBTBTB

Gordon stood by the door holding onto Alan's hand tightly. He wanted to look outside and see why Scott had called John, but he was afraid that he would get in trouble. He felt Alan squeeze his hand tightly. The eleven year old knelt next to his brother so that he could be eye level with the youngest blonde of the house,

"What's wrong Sprout?"

"Something's not right," The six year old whispered, "Gordy, where's Virgie?"

Gordon's blood ran cold and he felt an uneasy pit form in his stomach,

"I-I don't know…"

The door in front of them was suddenly thrown open and John came barrelling into the house nearly knocking the two younger boys over. Gordon was surprised to see that John was crying and he was trying to search for something frantically.

"Johnny," Alan whispered, "What's going on?"

John ignored the question and glanced at Gordon,

"Gordon, have you seen the phone?"

Gordon shook his head and John screamed in frustration. It scared Gordon to see his second oldest brother to lose his cool like this, he was usually so calm. Now, he knew something was definitely wrong.

"John, what's happening out there?" Gordon demanded, "Why did Scott want you? Why do you need the phone?"

Once again John ignored them when he yelled out triumphantly. The fourteen year old blonde grabbed the phone from between the seat cushions and began dialing the phone like crazy. As he waited for the phone to connect with the operator he turned to his youngest siblings,

"I know you guys have a lot of questions, but can you bring me thickest blankets we have from the storage closet?"

"But John…" The young aquanaut whined.

"Gordy, please!"

Gordon nodded in defeat and brought Alan upstairs to the closet. He flipped over a box and stood on it so that he could reach the blankets. He was able to grab three of them and he ran back downstairs with Alan close behind him. As they got closer to the living room, he could hear John sobbing into the phone,

"You have to hurry; my little brother was hit by a car!"

_Virgil…_

Gordon and Alan ran past their older brother before he could stop them. They quickly slipped on their shoes and ran into the falling snow. Scott's back was to them and his cries swallowed the cold air in the street. Gordon turned, with the blankets firmly in his grasp, to Alan,

"Go back inside."

"But Gordy…"

"Sprout, Johnny needs your help." Gordon coaxed softly, "You need to make sure he's alright."

"B-But Virgie…"

"He's going to be okay." Gordon pulled his younger brother against him with his free hand, "Just imagine him as he was and he'll get better."

"O-Okay Gordy."

Gordon watched the little blonde run back into the house and he relaxed when he shut the door. Alan didn't need to see one of his older brothers like this. Gordon rearranged the blankets and ran to Scott and his fallen brother. He felt like even though he was running, he couldn't get closer to them; he seemed to get farther and farther away. After what seemed like an eternity, Gordon finally reached his brothers. First his eyes landed on Scott who was still running his hand through Virgil's hair. That was normal, what wasn't normal was seeing the tears falling down Scott's face. His eyes then drifted to Virgil and the bile rose in his throat. His immediate older brother looked broken and he was covered in so much blood. Gordon had to look closely to see if he was breathing, and to his relief, he was – albeit very faintly.

"S-Scotty," His voice quivered, "Here's the blankets."

Scott robotically took the blankets from Gordon, initially not seeing who had supplied them. He draped them one by one over Virgil, carefully tucking them under his body. After he had finished he continued to run his hand through Virgil's hair. Then he finally seemed to process who was standing beside him…

"G-Gordon," Scott glanced up at his second youngest brother, "You shouldn't be out here, where is John?"

Gordon fell to his knees beside Scott and placed his hand on Virgil's cold cheek,

"Don't be mad at Johnny. He tried to stop us from knowing, but we overheard him talking on the phone when we brought the blankets from downstairs."

Scott nodded solemnly as he knew that it was next to impossible to hide anything from their younger siblings,

"How's John doing?"

"The same as you." Gordon whispered as his amber eyes pooled with tears, "He's so scared Scotty, but Alan is with him. Scotty, I'm scared too."

"He's going to be alright Gordy," Scott's voice broke, "He's going to pull through; it wouldn't be the first time."

"What are you talking about Scott?"

Ambulance sirens engulfed the still air causing Scott to visibly relax,

"Gordy, go inside and tell John to call Dad and meet Virg and I at the hospital okay?"

"Okay Scotty," Gordon got to his feet and wiped away his tears, "We'll see you soon."

Scott nodded as the ambulance stopped in front of them. Gordon ran into the house, but didn't shut the door until he saw the paramedics swarm around his brothers.

TBTBTBTBTB

The paramedics swarmed around Scott, and out of instinct he tried to pull his little brother closer. He felt a hand clasp onto his shoulder reassuringly,

"Son, what's your name?" A male paramedic asked.

"Scott," He muttered, "Please help my brother."

"We will," The paramedic assured him, "But you have to let go of him."

Scott held tighter, his need to protect his brother and shock overwhelmed all sense of reasoning,

"B-But I fought with him and said something I shouldn't have… I can't leave him."

The paramedic pried his hands off the form of the younger brother so that the other paramedics could do their job.

"You're not going to leave him, okay?" The paramedic soothed, "We just have to make him more comfortable and then we can all get into the ambulance."

Scott nodded and leaned his emotionally exhausted body into the paramedic,

"You'll be able to help him won't you? He's not as strong as the rest of us health wise."

"The rest of you?" The paramedic raised an eyebrow, "How many more brothers are here?"

"My three other younger brothers are in the house calling my Dad," Scott explained, "Virgil is weaker than the rest of us, you have to be careful with him."

"Okay, while you tell me what health problems to look out for, I'll send one of the other paramedics in to get your other brothers so they can ride with us."

Scott nodded again,

"Thank you."

"No problem Scott, now what problems does Virgil have?"

"He has asthma and has a weak immune system so he gets sick really easily. Recently we learned that he's allergic to penicillin and he's generally just small for his age." Scott smiled in spite of himself, "But he is definitely stronger when it comes to muscle mass, don't ask me how that's possible, it's just the way he is."

"That will help a lot," The paramedic encouraged, "Looks like your brothers are coming out of the house and Virgil is all loaded up, so we're going to head out a.s.a.p."

"Yes sir."

Scott pushed himself to his feet and his knee joints grinded together painfully. He walked over to his younger brothers and helped John carry them. He picked Alan up and carried him in his arms, burying the little boy's head into his neck. He could feel Alan's warm tears falling against his cold skin.

"S-Scotty?"

"Yes Allie?" His voice cracked.

"Virgie is going to be okay right?" Alan sobbed brokenly, "He's supposed to play piano."

"Yes Allie, Virg is going to be okay," Scott rubbed the boy's back, "He has to be."

TBTBTBTBTB

Jeff Tracy sped across town towards the hospital. His heart was beating a mile a minute as anxiety and guilt attacked him from the inside out. He thought he was going to keel over and die as soon as he heard John's broken voice when he called all but five minutes ago.

_Jeff was sitting in a meeting with different business associates from various different companies trying to finally build his lifelong dream. He was beginning to get the numbers he needed when his cell phone started going off in his pocket. He looked at the display and then glanced at the men apologetically,_

"_Sorry gentlemen, I need to take this."_

_The gentlemen looked at him in annoyance, but he silently stepped out of the conference room. He leaned against the wall and pinched the bridge of his nose before answering,_

"_Why aren't you boys at school…"_

"_DAD!" John cried, "Dad, you have to go to the hospital!"_

"_Why John? What happened?"_

"_It was an accident… he and Scott fought, they never fight… and then, and then, Scott must have said something because he ran out of the house and he was crying… and then, and then… it's so bad Dad. There's so m-much blood!"_

"_John, calm down son, I don't understand…"_

"_Virgil was hit by a truck!"_

_He felt the colour drain from his face and his legs felt weak,_

"_D-Did you call the ambulance?"_

"_Yeah… Scott's with him right now; he never left his side Dad, Virgil was never by himself."_

"_Okay, now listen to me, when the ambulance comes try and see if you can go into the hospital with them seeing as Scott doesn't have a car yet…"_

"_To be honest Dad," John choked, "Scott's pretty much gone; he's so scared Dad, I'm scared, Alan's scared and Gordon's scared… I don't know what to do!"_

"_Shhhh," Jeff soothed him, "Everything is going to be okay."_

"_I hope so… for not only my sake, or your sake or even Virgil's sake, but for Scott." _

"_What were they arguing about Johnny?"_

"_Virg was mad because Scotty is bailing on the concert this weekend. From what I heard Virg is under the impression it's because Scotty blamed him for Mom and, and…"_

"_And what?"_

"_Scott agreed and told Virg that that was the exact reason. I know he didn't mean it, Scotty was just mad and you know how his temper gets out of control. Virg ran out on him, with Scott following him, but then… Dad, if Virgil doesn't make it, we're going to lose Scott."_

Jeff couldn't help but agree with John. If Virgil died thinking that Scott blamed him, that Jeff blamed him for his mother's death, both of the eldest Tracys would never be the same again.

TBTBTBTBTB

Scott sat on the chair with his knees pulled up to his chest, waiting for his father and waiting for the doctor. He needed someone to tell him that Virgil was going to be alright, because after saying it while waiting for the ambulance, he no longer believed in his words. He could feel his closest brother getting cold in his hands, and he could see that his breathing was weak and ragged. Scott wanted nothing more to than to trade places with Virgil and take away all the pain. Scott already decided that if Virgil died, then he would die too. There was no way Scott could live a happy life knowing that he was the catalyst for Virgil's death. He still couldn't believe that the last thing he said to his brother was that he blamed him for his mother's death. How could he have said that! Virgil was stuck in that avalanche too, and without Virgil, Gordon wouldn't have survived either. Of all things to say when he lost his temper, he had to say that. He even hit him… he actually hit his brother; that in itself is unforgivable. He heard running footsteps approach them and he knew that it was his father. Scott glanced up and noticed the tense lines in his father's forehead and the fearful gaze in his gray eyes. Alan had got off of John's lap and ran to his father, tears still falling down his cheeks. The Tracy Patriarch scooped the youngest into his arms and held him close. Gordon was still latched onto John, refusing to let his other blonde brother leave him. John absently ran his hand through Gordon's hair whispering words of comfort, both to Gordon and himself. Their father made his way to where they were sitting and occupied the vacant seat next to Scott.

"Have we heard anything yet?"

Scott shook his head and stared expectantly at the two metal doors that answered every question he had about his brother. He suddenly felt some weight on his shoulder as he realized that John had leaned his head on Scott's shoulder. Tears were falling silently down his face; Scott felt that he had no more tears left to give. Scott looked back at the metal doors as they opened and a man sped towards the Tracy family, a grim smile set firmly on his face.

_Oh God._

"Are you Mr. Tracy?" The doctor inquired.

"Yes," The Tracy Patriarch stood.

"I'm Dr. Louis Knox; I'm the doctor who will be treating Virgil."

"How is he?" Their father's voice shook.

"Not well Mr. Tracy," Dr. Knox informed them sadly, "When the truck hit Virgil he broke a couple ribs, received a major concussion, had internal bleeding in his abdomen, he broke his left leg, as well as several lacerations along his face, neck, arms, chest and legs from hitting the windshield."

"No…" Scott choked out.

"Luckily, nothing in his arms were broken and the broken ribs didn't puncture any of his lungs." Dr. Knox explained, "We noticed that his breathing was laboured so we initially believed that he had punctured his lungs, but learned from information at the site that Virgil had asthma. Due to the shock his body received, his body was having trouble breathing on its own, so right now he is hooked up to a ventilator."

John paled,

"B-But wouldn't you normally use an oxygen mask or something… unless…"

"Mr. Tracy," Dr. Knox nodded sadly at the young blonde's intuition, "As of right now, Virgil is in acoma."

T.B.C


	2. Chapter 2

**I DON'T OWN THE THUNDERBIRDS OR THE MAGNIFICENT CHARACTERS THAT GO WITH IT! … although, I wish I could have Virgil and Scott…**

Scott's very world crumpled around him. Acoma… Acoma… his middle brother was in acoma. The hospital spun around him as his legs buckled from underneath him; he felt arms wrap around him and hold him up. He could hear someone calling his name, but he didn't have the means to respond. He was trapped in his own body, imprisoned by his harsh words and drowned by his never-ending guilt. Virgil was only thirteen years old, and as of right now, his very life was hanging on a thread. Just a week ago, Scott had sat beside him and listened to him play the piano. A few days ago, Scott had gone with Virgil to the park in the early hours of the morning just so Virgil could capture that perfect sunset. Just the other night, Scott had woken from a nightmare and it was Virgil who came to him and sang him back to sleep. Scott needed Virgil; they were always together. But that morning, he destroyed everything; he just had to break his little brother's heart didn't he. Now Virgil was in acoma, and he might never wake up. Scott felt someone's arms wrap around him in a warm comforting embrace, but he didn't deserve the comfort. He wished his family would hate him for what happened; it would make everything so much easier; but that would never happen.

That's when Scott Tracy shut down…

TBTBTBTBTB

"SCOTT!"

John had barely managed to catch his older brother before he had deadpanned on the tiled floor. Scott no longer had the emotional strength to hold his own weight, and it was making John's own knees buckle. John dragged his older brother to one of the chairs and sat him down. He watched as the pain contorted his brother's normally confident exterior and wrapped his arms tightly around him, grounding him to the reality that Virgil would make it through. John pulled away and his heart all but shattered when he saw the vacancy in Scott's normally bright cobalt blue eyes.

"D-Dad," John's voice broke, "He's gone."

"It's going to be okay," His dad placed his hand on his shoulder, "He'll come out of it."

John's eyes welled up,

"But, what if he doesn't."

His father gave Alan to Gordon for a moment and wrapped his arms around his quietest son,

"Johnny, he'll be okay when Virg wakes up."

"Dad, Virg needs Scott to wake up."

"What are you talking about John?"

John shook his head unable to answer. He felt a little hand tug on his own. He turned and saw Alan holding onto his hand. The youngest Tracy squeezed his older brother's hand comfortingly. John knew that Alan didn't understand what was happening around him; all Alan knew was that one of his older brothers was hurt and everyone else including himself were sad. John tightened his hand around Alan's and a surprisingly devious smile formed on his face.

"Dad," He whispered, "See if you can take Gordy and Allie to see Virg."

"What about you son, don't you want to come along?" His father bit his lip.

"I'll come later," He jerked his thumb towards his only older brother, "I have to deal with him first."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure." John glanced up at his father, "I'll bring Scott over as soon as I can."

"Okay, we'll see you soon."

John watched as his father and younger brothers disappeared around the corner. John stared at Scott's rigged form and his stomach dropped. Scott was going to explode after this, but at this point John didn't care. He just wanted his oldest brother back. He needed Scott to tell him he was going to be okay, he needed to Scott to tell Virgil that he was going to be okay and that he was sorry; neither of those were going to happen if Scott stayed the way he was, so John did the only thing he was really able to do. John gathered up all of his courage and drew his fist back. With all the strength he could muster, he flew his fist forward and struck Scott in the jaw,

"SCOTT SMARTEN THE HELL UP!"

Scott blinked in confusion and rubbed his jaw, anger and tears of anguish slowly welling up in his eyes,

"John, what the hell was that for?!"

"You're being an idiot Scott!" John yelled, anger of his own starting to surface, "It's not your fault that this happened! You couldn't have done anything to stop it!"

"Johnny,"

"Don't you 'Johnny' me Scott Carpenter Tracy!" John growled, "Alan and Gordon need you, Dad needs you, I need you, hell, VIRGIL needs you! You can't shut down like that! I understand that you feel guilty about what happened, but so do we! He's our family too Scott, you're not the only one who was affected by the accident!"

"Do you even know what I said to him John?! I blamed him for everything! I blamed him for everything that he had no control over! That last thing he heard me say was that I blamed him for Mom; what kind of big brother says that?!"

John sighed and sat next to his older brother; he draped his arm over his shoulders and leaned on him.

"All of us have done something stupid when Virgil was involved. The only two people who haven't really said anything negative to him were Alan and Grandma. Gordon even snapped at Virgil a couple days ago." John sighed, "It was something stupid of course; it was something about Virg not going to watch his swimming practice and not supporting him. Gordon told Virg that he hated him and that he never wanted to see him again. Of course Gordy apologized and everything is okay between them, but imagine how Gordy feels knowing that he said something like that to Virg and now Virg is in the hospital."

"I didn't even know that happened." Scott whispered.

"You haven't been around lately Scott," John glanced at him, "You know that's the real reason why Virgil is frustrated with you."

"I try and be home, really I do," Scott glared at his feet, "But I don't like being home with dad."

That surprised John and he probably looked it. Luckily Scott was still staring at his feet,

"Why are you avoiding dad?"

"I'm still mad at him, for abandoning us, for abandoning Virgil."

John had a feeling that was what the aspiring pilot was going to say. He listened intently as his oldest brother continued,

"I know I shouldn't be mad at him; that's just how he dealt with the grief. But even now, he still doesn't look Virgil in the eyes. I know that Virg resembles mom, and I know it can be hard sometimes, but Virgil isn't mom. There different in a lot of ways and I wish that dad could see past Virgil's looks and his inherited talents and just look at Virgil for who he is; an intelligent thirteen year old, who wants nothing more than to help others." Scott sighed and ran his hand through his hair, "Did he ever tell you what he wanted to do when he was older?"

John shook his head,

"No, but I always assumed it would be something artistic or musical."

Scott laughed,

"I thought that too, but one day I was doing that damn aptitude test online that one of my teachers assigned. Virg was sitting beside me, like always, but he was just silent. He asked me what I wanted to do, and I of course told him that I wanted to be a pilot. I asked him what he wanted to do and know what he told me?" John shook his head, "He told me he wanted to be an engineer. He said it was like art in the way that he was creating something beautiful; but he wanted his 'artwork' to save lives."

"I never thought of that," John said thoughtfully, "He does like building things."

"I know," Scott laughed, "Ever since he told me, I've noticed that he loves working with his hands; he always seems to be tinkering with something or another."

John couldn't help but smile at the sparkle in his brother's eye. He lifted his arm of Scott's shoulder and gazed at him sadly,

"Scotty,"

"Yeah?"

"Can you promise me something?"

"Yeah, I'll promise you anything."

"Even if you're frustrated with dad's actions in the past," John squeezed Scott's knee, "Can you come home more often."

The sixteen year old looked into his fourteen year old brother's electric blue eyes and smiled,

"Of course Johnny."

"Thanks it would mean a lot to everyone," John smiled back, "How about we go check on Ace?"

Scott visibly gulped and nodded. The two brothers were about to get to their feet when their father and brothers came running towards them; terror and confusion etched onto their already stressed out faces. That's when John knew things have went from bad to worse.

TBTBTBTBTB

For the millionth time that day, all of Scott's colour drained from his face. His father looked absolutely terrified; his father never looked terrified, his dad wasn't afraid of anything. He felt two little bodies fly against him and he caught them without falling over. Gordon and Alan were crying uncontrollably and Scott had no idea why. His dad stopped in front of them and Scott saw that his dad was crying too.

"Dad, what's going on?" Scott demanded.

"The machines malfunctioned." Their father sobbed.

"Machines?" John paled, "What machines?"

"I'm so sorry boys…" Their father choked, "The ventilator malfunctioned."

Scott's world once again swirled around him, but with John's tight grip on his arm Scott was able to stay grounded,

"What's going to happen to Virgil?"

"They're trying to revive him, but…"

"NO!"

Scott pushed his two younger brothers, as gently as he could, to John and bolted towards the I.C.U. He heard his father calling after him, but Scott had only one thing on his mind. He burst through the doors of the I.C.U. and saw a group of doctors trying to resuscitate his younger brother; he wasn't responding. He felt someone's hand wrap around his arm and try and drag him out,

"Son, you shouldn't be in here." One of the doctors whispered.

"Let go of me!"

Scott wrestled out of his grip and threw himself into the doctors surrounding Virgil. He broke through and he found himself right beside his brother. He hastily grabbed hold of his musical brother's cold hand and he broke into sobs. Virgil's hospital shirt had been torn open and slight bruising could be seen on his ribs from where they tried to revive him. Scott could see every cut and bruise on his pale face and his body. His brother's leg was in a cast and bandages were wrapped firmly around his abdomen. Hands once again wrapped around Scott and he lashed out striking the stranger in the ribs.

"Don't touch me you bastard!"

"I'm sorry we tried everything…"

Scott ignored them and looked at his favourite brother. The brother who got him through everything even if he didn't understand what was happening most of the time. Scott squeezed Virgil's cold hand in his and held it to his chest; tears rolled down Scott's cheeks like a never-ending waterfall.

"Virgil," Scott choked, "Ace, please don't leave me!"

"Son, he's already…" The doctor from earlier began.

"Shut the fuck up!" Scott screamed.

The room went silent, and Scott continued to stare at his brother. He sent a prayer up to God and to his mother so they wouldn't take Virgil away from him.

"Ace, I have so much to tell you. I have to tell you how sorry I am, I didn't mean anything I said to you. I love you so much and I don't blame you for what happened to Mom. Without you Ace, Squirt probably wouldn't be here with us. You kept him warm Ace, you kept him breathing, and you made sure he lived even if you died. Until today, that was the scariest moment of my life, but this, this takes the cake. Ace, I need you by my side! You were so brave when Mom left us, without you I probably wouldn't have been able to step up to the plate. I know the past couple years have been hard on you Ace, but you hardly ever showed it. We would only know how upset you really were because of the nightmares in the middle of the night. But even then, you didn't think of yourself. When the rest of us had nightmares, you were right there, singing, telling us everything would work out; you were so positive. Ace, I'm not the only one who needs you; Starboy, Squirt and Sprout need you too. Ace, sometimes I think about how close we were to losing you. Squirt and Sprout wouldn't know about it and John was only one so he probably wouldn't remember; hell dad would be surprised that I can even remember since I was only three at the time. I remember going to the hospital with Grandma and Johnny excited to see mom and dad and more than a little nervous about being a big brother to another baby. I remember the fear and sadness in mom and dad's eyes when they told Grandma that you were too small and that had a very slim chance of surviving. Dad asked me if I still wanted to see my new brother and even though I was terrified I told him I did. He brought me to the incubator in the corner of the room and lifted me up so I could see you. Ace, you were so small and you had all those wires attached to you. Everyone was so sad, but I was happy; I knew that you would pull through; just like I know you will pull through now. Ace, when I said I couldn't come to your concert this weekend, you were so heartbroken and it's another thing I wish I never said to you. I should have kept my promise to you. You're right part of the reason was because Mom's anniversary is this weekend, but that's not the only reason why. Ace, I was actually going to go, but I was going to meet you backstage, so that I would be the first person you see when you get off. I know that sounds like a stupid excuse, hell, I know it is. I shouldn't have said that to you Ace, I should've known that you were afraid that I hated you. I could never hate you…"

Arms wrapped around Scott's waist and lifted him off the ground. Virgil's hand slipped from his grasp and he fought against the arms that were holding him, but he wasn't strong enough; this stranger was bigger than the others. He reached out his arm and stretched out towards his brother's still form,

"VIRGIL!" He screamed desperately, "ACE! PLEASE COME BACK! I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART! DON'T LEAVE ME!"

As Scott was being dragged out of the room, Virgil's hand twitched. Through all the chaos no one noticed Virgil's honey-brown eyes open exhaustedly. He couldn't help but smile at the scene before him; typical Scott…

"Sparky," He croaked.

The chaos stopped and everyone looked at the boy-who was dead a moment ago-with eyes the size of saucers.

"V-Virgil?"

"Hi Scott."

The man holding Scott let go and Scott ran back to his middle brother, once again grabbing onto his hand. Scott smiled at the warmth that was starting to appear in Virgil's touch. Scott ran his free hand through Virgil's chestnut brown hair with the tears still falling down his cheeks.

"Hey there Ace," Scott kissed his brother's forehead, "Don't you do that again, you almost gave all of us a heart attack."

"I know Sparky, I'm sorry."

"Shh," Scott soothed, "Don't apologize, I'm the one who should be."

"You already have," Virgil's eyes began to drift closed, "I heard you, you brought me back Sparky."

"Just sleep Ace, you need it." Scott smiled, "I love you, we all love you; Johnny, Gordy, Allie and Dad."

"I know," Virgil's eyes closed peacefully, "I love you too."

Scott watched as Virgil slept; his chest rising and falling on its own. He continued to run his hand through his brother's hair even as he heard the rest of his family enter the room. Without hesitating or looking at his family he whispered to them,

"Everything is going to be alright."


End file.
